Showing posts with label humour. Show all posts
Showing posts with label humour. Show all posts

2013-04-22

The Canon T5i Rebel


Concept: 1 out of 5
Execution: 2 out of 5
Yeah, but: Canon T5i Rebel don't care.

Counter Opinion: This is the Canon T5i Rebel. Watch it run in slow motion. It's pretty bad-ass.

Look, it runs all over the place. "Woah, watch out!" says that Pentax. Ew it's got a Nikon? Oh, it's chasing a Sony? Oh my gosh! Oh the Canon T5i Rebels are just flippy!

The Canon T5i Rebel's been referred to by the Guinness Book of World Records as the most fearless camera in all the camera kingdom. It really doesn't give a shit. If it's hungry, it's hungry – ew what's that in its mouth? Oh it's got a Nikon? Oh it runs backwards? Now watch this, look, a Nikon's up in a tree. Canon T5i Rebel don't care. Canon T5i Rebel don't give a shit, it just takes what it wants. Whenever it's hungry it just – ew! And it eats Nikons?

Oh my God watch it dig. Look at that digging. The Canon T5i Rebel's really pretty bad-ass. They have no regard for any other camera whatsoever. Look at him just grunting and – ew! Eating Nikons! Ew what's that, a Fujifilm? Oh that's nasty. Oh, they're so nasty! Oo look! It's chasing things, and eating them.


The Canon T5i Rebels have a fairly long body, but a distinctly thick set, broad shoulders, and you know, their, their skin is loose, allowing them to move about freely, they twist around. Now look, here's a house full of Panasonics. You think the Canon T5i Rebel cares? It doesn't give a shit. It goes right into the house of Panasonics to get some Olympus.

How disgusting is that? It eats Olympus. Ew, that's so nasty.

But look, the Canon T5i Rebel doesn't care, it's getting stung like a thousand times. It doesn't give a shit, it just, it's hungry. It doesn't care about being stung by Panasonics. Nothing can stop the Canon T5i Rebel when it's hungry.

Oh what a nasty fuck! Look! Ew, it's eating Olympus, that's disgusting. There it is running in slow motion again. See?

Now what's interesting is that other, other cameras like these Pentax here, they just like to wait around until the Canon T5i Rebel's done eating and then it swoops in to pick up the scraps. It says, "You do all the work for us Canon T5i Rebel and we'll just eat whatever you find, how's that? What do you say, stupid?"

Look at this Pentax. "Thanks for the treat, stupid!" "Hey, come back here" says the Canon T5i Rebel. Pentaxes don't care, and you know what, the Sonys do it, too. Look at these little Cybershots. They're like, "Thanks, Stupid! Thanks for the Fujifilm! See ya later!" The Canon T5i Rebel does all the work while these other cameras just pick up the scraps.


At night time, the Canon T5i Rebel goes hunting, cuz it's hungry. Look! Here comes a fierce battle between a Nikon and a Canon T5i Rebel. I wonder what will happen? Look at this, there's the Canon T5i Rebel just eating a Fujifilm. And then look. "Get away from me!" says the Nikon, "Get away from me!"

Canon T5i Rebel don't care. Canon T5i Rebel smacks the shit out of it. The Nikon comes back and it lashes right at the Canon T5i Rebel. Oh! Little does the Canon T5i Rebel know, FYI, it's been stung! It's been bitten by the Nikon, so while it's eating the Nikon – ew, that's disgusting – meanwhile the poisonous venom is seeping through the Canon T5i Rebel's body, and it passes out.

Look at that sleepy fuck.

Now the Canon T5i Rebel's just gonna pass out for a few minutes and then it's gonna get right back up and start eating all over again, cuz it's a hungry little bastard. Look at this! Like nothing happened, the Canon T5i Rebel gets right back up and continues eating the Nikon! How disgusting. And of course, what does a Canon T5i Rebel have to eat for the next few weeks? Nikon.

The Canon T5i Rebel.



Counter Opinions are quick "sales counter" product reviews.

As always, viewer discretion is advised.
Last updated 22 apr 2013

2012-08-22

XKCD: Star Ratings



Concept:  4 out of 5
Execution:  4 out of 5
Yeah, but:  Can't give it perfect…

The Short Version:  XKCD is frequently funny, and this is exactly why we don't use the standard five-star rating here.


last updated 22 august 2012

2012-05-07

Canon 5D Mark III: The Ultimate DSLR


Concept: 4 out of 5
Execution: 1 out of 5
Yeah, but: Inconceivable!

The Long Version: It's official. Canon has ceded the high-end SLR market to Nikon. It's not surprising, given the seven-month-and-counting wait for the thrice-delayed 1Dx flagship, and the tepid market response to their modest 5D refresh effort, but I still would never have expected their concession announcement to take the form of a poster in a marketing campaign.

Ultimate: last, furthest or farthest, ending a process or series; being last in a series, process, or progression; final.

It's sad to see the quarter-century EOS legacy end this way, but like I always say: "ah, well." Nikon makes good cameras, and hopefully they'll continue to innovate and push forward even without the major-brand competition. And for those of you with a good investment in Canon lenses, don't worry, it looks like the Rebel line will still continue.


last updated 7 may 2012

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